See Stevie Decorate (Twin Time!)

It's been a MONDAY, even if it's 10 minutes past midnight into Tuesday for me.  Uff da, yes?  I think one of the best things to do when having a (bad, very bad, insanely bad, whatever) day  is to do something nice for someone else.  So!

My twin sister, the one that rudely swiped away all the Interior Designing Skillz DNA away from me in vitro, has entered a design contest!  And while it's always been our jobs to constantly knock each other offer our pedestals keep each other humble, I really do think she can design the living daylights out of a house:

(And she can also collect Jonathan Adler pieces/shades of turquoises/random stray dogs like no other.)

She needs votes to make it to the next round in the contest, though, so if you like her place as much as I do, please head right here to vote!

It would honestly brighten my awful day a bit, and I'm sure it'd brighten hers too, even though she's always been the more moody, uncommunicative twin that isn't as "in touch with her sensitive side" so she'll likely just give you a nice wave instead of a hug.  It's only one vote per person, but you can use your Facebook account so you don't have to go through an entire registration process (because that's always irritating, isn't it?).

It would mean a lot to me, mostly because my sister NEVER enters these contests and I always think what she does is lots of fun and contest-winning worthy!  I'd also love to have her  come out to Colorado to help ME, and in fact clearly requested it as a legal contract to blog about her house being in a contest on my blog, but she refused and instead gave me naming rights to her first born child (wow, right? I know!) and I can't wait for the day when her and her husband Jason bring little Electrolux Blender "The Moose" Shea into the world.

And I know it's kind of a strange name for a girl, but I wanted to give her something that would help her stand out in the midst of the "Michaela's" and "Isabella's" and "Chloe's" over-populating the world.  Unless Stevie and her husband accidentally have twins or quadruplets, of course, then it's ON and I'll really bring it with a complete collection of kitchen appliance-themed names*.

Go vote!











*I completely made that up about naming rights; I will give you all a moment in order to let the disbelief and shock sink in.  But it would be nice if she came to Colorado and helped her poor poi-colored-painting-sister** out a bit with her own remodel, hm?

**try saying THAT 10 times fast!  and then go vote. ;)

Chloe's Capacious Closet (In Between Things & The Fancy Crepe Military Jacket)

So as I've already ranted about on twitter, for some reason I decided it'd be a lovely idea to accidentally paint our sitting room the exact same shade as poi.  For those of you that don't know what poi is, here you go:

And it tastes preeeetty much just like what you would think grayish, purpleish slop tastes like- not awesome, oopsies.

So having walls the exact same color of something that tastes not awesome wasn't exactly what I intended, and in the meanwhile it's all ripped to shreds and probably will be for some time. So I decided to wade my way in and snap a few pics of this jacket anyhow, because unlike my walls it is awesome and things that are awesome tend to disappear fast on Ann Taylor.  Also, the way we're going with this remodel, it might be years before the sitting room is put back together in a presentable way, so you're likely going to be seeing a lot more of this, woohoo.  

(Cue me trying to figure out what looks good with painter scrubs and a hard hat and we'll be all set.  Petunia has already put in her request for a leopard-print hard hat, size xxxxxxs, because she's a diva like that and has no clue, no clue at all about the value of a hard-earned dollar, that dog.)

I digress! Like most little fashion bloggers, I was a huuuge fan of the J Crew Bella jacket when it came out a few years ago and literally wore mine in black to pieces.  One of my favorite "easy" outfits for fall and winter is a black, fitted jacket paired with skinnies and boots, and I think that this jacket from Ann Taylor will work perfectly as a much-needed replacement for my poor, overly-worn Bella. The princess seams give the jacket a really nice, slim fit, and the subtle ruffle on the edge makes the jacket pretty without being too cute.  

I did accidentally order mine in a regular size (not petite) so the sleeves are a touch long, but not enough to bother me and exchange.  I actually like longer sleeves on my jackets for winter- they come in handy for when I (always) forget my mittens!  The fabric is thick (not super-duper-bitter-cold-winter-day thick, but about the same thickness as the Bella- will be wearable through most of fall and on warmer winter days!) and stretchy, the shoulders have a slight stiffness/padding to them to give them some structure and shape, and it can also be worn buttoned more like a peacoat, if desired:

Since I am wearing the regular size versus petite and love the fit, I would say this fits nearly one whole size small; it's snug especially through the rib/bust area, so consider sizing up a size if you're busty and/or like to wear lots of layers under your jackets in the winter. 

You can buy the jacket here, and take 30% off with code "SEPT30" too, yippee.

PS- I know the walls look slightly violet here, but indoor lighting mixed with other factors can do that.  It's the color of poi. Poi-colored walls.  Trust.



PPS- I should add that my mom asked why I painted my walls that color- did they mix the paint wrong?   They must have mixed the paint wrong.  No, no mom. I chose that color. Me.  And Husband is waiting for me to pick another color to try, ha oh lucky day!  *punches self in the face*

Outfit Of The Day (The Last Hurrahs)

Even if the temps here have been bouncing all over the place, there's no denying that the late night and early morning air here in Colorado has taken on that certain chill that only shows up when fall is around the corner.  Halloween candy is already at the grocery store (mellowcreme pumpkins,  yesss!) and stores are stuffed full of tweeds, wools, and tenebrous, murky-hued fabrics that are synonymous only with colder weather.

MEH.

Time to be annoyingly cheery!

Jacket: J Crew (similar style here) (and here) (and here) (this cardigan in bronzed twig would work, too!)

Corset: Nanette Lepore Ladies Night Corset (similar style here) (love this WHBM corset, too + 20% off and free shipping with code "9187")

Pants: Ann Taylor Stretch Twill Pants (buy them here + $20 off)

Shoes: J Crew Pippa Peep Toes (similar style here) (and here + $10 off with code "FALLSHOP")

Belts: J Crew (similar style here)

Bag: Chloe Marcie Crossbody (similar style here) (and here) (and here + 10% off with code "CLASSACT")

Necklace: Second Look Jewelery on Etsy (similar style here)

In Review (Anthropologie's Dollhouse Jacket)

(elevenses doll house jacket - anthropologie)

Oh, the new fall and winter arrivals at Anthropologie, how I love thee.  When I first spied this darling little jacket by Elevenses online last week, I immediately knew two things:

1. Oh gosh, I love a good bow and peplum hem. This jacket has A BOW! And a PEPLUM HEM!

2. Someone at Anthropologie is evil, and I mean a bad-sort-of-evil, and clearly out to get me and ruin me and leave me with a closet full of 234092380947 Anthropologie jackets and coats this winter, that jerk.

3. Okay three things- I'm not exactly sure what the difference is between a good-sort-of-evil and a bad-sort-of-evil, but if you've ever shopped at Anthropologie, or even That Place Where I Can't Ever Escape and Spend Less Than $100 Called Target- then I'm pretty sure that you know exactly what I'm talking about, and don't pretend like you don't 'cuz you do.

So after scouting out my local Anthropologie this past weekend and not finding the jacket (big surprise- I have the smallest, saddest Anthropologie ever in the mall near me), I decided to order it.   Might as well with that free shipping promo they're still running and all. Wouldn't want that to go to waste, whistle whistle.

And when the jacket arrived, I also immediately (again) knew two things:

1. This isn't a jacket.  More of a heavy, jersey-knit cardigan.

2. And that's not a bow, but a ruffle shaped into a bow. A ruffle pretending to be a bow, really- the worst kind of ruffle there is, if you ask me.

Oh dear. So we have a cardigan disguised as a jacket and a ruffle disguised as a bow.  False advertising aside, after reshaping the smooshed ruffle back into a bow-like shape with some Downy Wrinkle Release and a whole 'lotta free time on my hands, I kind of...well.  I like it?

Perhaps it's the adult in me, perhaps it's the understanding that things aren't always quite as they appear but can we can still like them anyway (example: broccoli covered in cheese), or perhaps it's the fact that it took me almost 15 years to realize that it wasn't Disney Land that I could see from my bedroom window at our old house in Sioux Falls, South Dakota like my dad insisted, it was actually a big catholic church and Mickey Mouse doesn't live in big catholic churches in South Dakota- whatever.  Delusions and disappointments aside, I'm keeping the jacket.

The specifications: it fits TTS (I'm wearing an XS), fits slightly short through the torso (the pink tank I'm wearing yanked down is a bit of a dumb illusion and makes it look cropped, which it isn't) and I have the sleeves cuffed up because like almost all jackets or "jackets", they're too long for my short arms.  It gets bonus points for being hand washable and light enough to wear as the temps in the morning here in Colorado have been dipping to around 54 degrees.

Here you go*:

(*family members and/or people reading this that have known me since I was 2: that last shot is of me smoothing the ruffle down to show that it isn't really a bow; not me practicing my Flirty Girl Fitness Moves®)

(*'cuz like most 28 year olds, I only practice my Flirty Girl Fitness Moves® by myself and near my portable and easy to install Flirty Girl Fitness Pole after I've had my six pre-workout fat-blasting Flirty Girl Fitness Appletinis, an entire large pizza, and of course- a haphazard go around with a Shake Weight)

(*please consult your physician before starting this or any fitness program)

And here you go again, because I have entiiiiirely too much time on my hands today:

What do you guys think of Anthropologie's new fall/winter arrivals?  Anything catching your eye?  Share in the comments!

Outfit Of The Day (I Got That Boom Boom Pow)

Here I am, here I am.  I had a big revelation yesterday, bigger than the one I had on Sunday when I realized (upon accidentally dropping the handful of paint chips I had to the ground in the middle of  Home Depot) that I was matching paint colors to the shoes I was wearing and doing a preeetty dang-dandy-good-job of it:

I have found what we'll be doing in the sitting room. 

Found it, found it, thank  you Google images:

I'm feeling the grayish-taupe movement at the moment, even if Husband asked a few days ago if I could stop calling it "taupe". I changed it to, "Motherfuckin' Taupe, Bitch" instead, as in, "We're going to paint this sitting room some Motherfuckin' Taupe, Bitch!" but apparently that wasn't what he wanted either, he wanted me to completely eliminate the word from my vocabulary (not toughin' it up, my bad) as it's really kind of an ugly and gross word to say, much like the words phlegm, mucus, and Mel Gibson.  

Also, Sherwin Williams apparently doesn't have a paint color called "Motherfuckin' Taupe Bitch" although if I worked for them, they would.  If I had things my way I'd also have two baby kittens right now, one named Playstation 4 (middle name: NCAA Football The 11tth) and the other Karaoke Machine (middle name: Lloyd), but we'll save that conversation for some other time.  All I'll say is that Husband said he wanted a Playstation 4 for his birthday, but he didn't specify that it had to be a gaming system; just like he didn't clearly specify his request for me to completely drop the word "taupe" from my vocabulary until after I already had it cemented into my brain.  Minute details, really, but not important.  I'm just more worried about how I'm going to shorten Playstation 4 NCAA Football The 11th's name into something easier to say so the other cats at school don't make fun of her.

So I really liked the photo above and all the colors used (including that orange chair, zing!), but I knew it was definitely meant to be when I discovered this:

What you guys don't realize is that I'm really 3 feet tall and all of our current furniture has just been built to make me appear larger.  They have our rose picture, too!  It's meant to be! And now when my gramma asks, "What is a blog?  What do you do on a...blog?" I can proudly say that I take pictures, but not those types of pictures, and occasionally I will also pose on top of tables, but...not those types of tables.  

Considering she's almost 80 and calls Hugh Hefner "Huge Hefner", I'm sure she'll know exactly what I'm talking about.

Outfit of the day time!  I think pairing a pretty, lightweight sweater with a statement necklace is one of my favorite casual looks, mostly because it looks polished but is still comfy to wear.  I grabbed this cardigan about 10 months ago from Forever 21's Twelve by Twelve line; but unfortunately, since Twelve by Twelve is a bit more wacky, it was impossible to find a similar style sweater to link to for this post, so I've instead included links of other sweaters that would still pair nicely with this look:

Sweater: Forever 21 (cute alternative) (and here on sale for $19.99!) (and here)

Shorts: Urban Outfitters (similar style here) (and here)

Shoes: J Crew (similar style here) (and here)

Necklace: Ann Taylor (similar style here) (and here)

Bag: Fendi B Bag (similar style here) (and here - tweed!)

Oh And Stuff.

Well, well, well.  My one and only CF card decided to bite the dust this afternoon.  I had a hunch that it was coming due to the random(ly insane) amount of errors popping up, but when a loved one dies or is dying I tend to go into denial like most of us do.  And, well,  at least it bit the dust now, and not like that one rat bastard of a CF card I had in the past, you know- that really bad one that decided to selfishly commit suicide that one day, oh, a few years ago when I went to Hawaii and got married and had snapped a bunch of pictures of Husband and I looking all cute and dolled up in wedding attire only to get the YELLOW QUESTION MARK OF DEATH (thanks Canon!) upon trying to look at the pics a few hours later.

I mean, noooo biggie there. It was just my wedding day.  It's a good thing we all have lots of wedding days in Hawaii, so many that it's almost obnoxious and I can barely keep track of them all, so I'll  probably be able to recreate my lost pictures soon. Whew.

Anyway!  So let's look at some of what I've been up to over the past few weeks, aside from sitting here being bitter and resentful, via a bunch of grainy and awful iphone pics.  Please ignore the fact that we all look like shiny, frazzled red tomatoes in half of them. I'm not sure why that is, but I think it probably has something to do with the elevation, the extreme humidity, and South Dakota's close proximity  to Nebraska, Iowa, Minnesota, if Crayola made Old Country Buffet Into a Crayola crayon color, and Pat O'Brien.

Oh, and we were reeeeally drunk.

But they're fun. We had fun! Enjoy:

Wait.  That's not a good starting place.

It's a long, long drive.

Bikers from Sturgis.  After 400 miles of seeing them, I had myself fairly convinced that I was ready for my own hog for next year.

You go, girl.

Twin sister, heading to the wedding

Me, also heading to the wedding.

Husband!

Squinty McGee.

Getting the party started.

One of those types of parties.

Twin sister, awesome friend Patty, me.

Told you.

Yes!

Heading back home and saw this on I-80.

Kitty after we got stuck in the thunderstorm/tornado warning at Sterling.

 

Kitty is traumatized, and rightly so.

Rainbow!

Doing that freaky sun-rain-tornado thing.

Home Depot Time (yesterday).

Walking, walking.  We're kinda fancy.

I have no idea which light fixture I'm looking at here, either. Perfect!

Sunny day.

Colorful Colorado.

Outfit Of The Day (A Total Wash)

Well, it's been pretty much the most unproductive week ever in the Chloe Conspiracy Blog household, and it looks like it will probably continue that way through the weekend.  Oh, my poor neglected little blog!  Occasionally real life matters need to be handled and it finds it way to the back burner, but no worries- I'm gearing up to finally take this sucker off of auto-pilot and I should be back into my regular posting/writing/ranting groove come Monday. 

In the meanwhile, I've been busy preparing for  (hopefully) (finally?) starting the home remodel.  Er, ha ha ho, I mean, I have colors picked out and a hysterically expensive bad ass zebra chair I want to shove into a corner, and I'm pretty sure that counts for something, hm?  

(Of course it counts for something. It should. I'm going to Martha Stewart the shit out of this remodel!)

(And if all goes well, you guys might soon be seeing Outfit Of The Days that are splattered in paint! And since I've never painted before, so you might also be seeing Outfit of the Day pictures featuring Husband, too!)

(You know- pictures of him strangling me.  I do always enjoy a good action shot.)

I digress; on to what I'm wearing.  Husband and I went to the Taste Of The CountyWeLiveIn last night, and much like how this week has been going, we managed to unproductively walk away $40 lighter with our bellies stuffed full of about .5 ounces of peach ice cream, 4 ounces of lasagna, and a half of a garlic knot.  It was too crowded, CountyILiveIn!  Get a bigger venue!

As you all know, it's quite a difficult and stressful task for a girl to figure out the perfect outfit to wear for standing in long lines in an Expo building while waiting for her 5 ounces of food, and I would like to say that this outfit didn't let me down.  It's also shockingly versatile, as I happily discovered that it was the perfect outfit to compliment the $1.29 Totino's Party Pizza we made for ourselves upon returning home:

 Cardigan: J Crew (similar style here) (and here, on sale) (and here)

Cami: Target Ruffle Cami (buy it here)

Jeans: GAP denim leggings (buy them here) (similar style here)

Belt: J Crew (similar style here) (and here)

Shoes: Christian Louboutin Gres 70 Jute Pumps (buy them here) (similar style here)

Bag: Chloe Paraty in Rosewood (similar style here) (love this, too)

And last but not least- I have to give a shout out!  Some of you might remember Shasta (of My Blonde Reality and then My Brunette Reality).  She's now blogging over at Cupcake Mag!  It's a sweet little e-zine full of fashion and beauty articles, and even the occasional celeb interview.  Go check her out, and happy weekend!

ETA: Okay okay okay, one more thing- the sold out Love21 Lilac One-shouldered Grecian Dress that I'm wearing in this post is back up on Forever 21! For just under $30, I highly recommend it. ♥

Chloe's Capacious Closet (LET'S GO!!)

One of the more frustrating things for me about going on a trip/vacay is the recovery period after- it lasts days, sometimes even up to an entire week for me.  A Lupus flare is almost always unavoidable, and I'm tired, my mouth is full of sores, I hurt all over (and the few nights we spent at the bars didn't help - it goes right to my joints), I'm headachey/migrainy, and pretty much as unproductive as a person can be.  Nothing helps, not even Lil' Jon'ing it in my head with a few YEAH!!'s and LET'S GO!!'s.

Yes readers, it's that bad.

I did manage to muster up a bit of energy last night to plug a new air freshner into the wall- that should count for something, hm?  I even had to unwrap it from its package and everything.  Talk about a virtuous triumph over personal tragedy and despair. Am I 28...or really 82?  Nobody knows, nobody knows, not even me.

Anyway.  As you all know, I have a sliiiiight obsession with Chloe handbags, and when I found the small Marcie crossbody I'm wearing below for a downright steal on Ebay a few weeks ago, I grabbed it.  I had been searching for the perfect cream/ivory/beige handbag for awhile now,and this fits the bill perfectly.

I know shopping on Ebay, especially for higher end things, can be downright intimidating (is the handbag real?  is the seller legit?) but as long as you know how to do it, I've found it's pretty much failproof.  Always pick a seller with great feedback (and lots of it!) and if you have any doubts if the handbag is legit, get it checked out over at The Purse Forum.  There are lots of lovely ladies that are willing to help out; just check the "Authenticate This" threads that they have for nearly every brand of handbag out there.  They also have threads dedicated to the names of trusthworthy sellers on Ebay; and always remember that a legit seller will also be more than willing to provide you with photos of the inside of the bags (serial numbers, holograms, etc) if you ask, so don't be afraid to get answers for all of your questions before purchasing. 

Turns out the seller of this bag had received it as a gift and it just wasn't her style, so an unused Marcie crossbody for less than 1/2 its retail price?  Perfect!  But now I really am done with buying handbags, forever and ever and ever.  I mean, aside from the fact that they never talk back, are easy to take care of, and I'm pretty sure will take care of me into my old age and keep me out of a nursing home unlike some other people's children, I am hand-bagged out for now. 

I realize that you can barely see the poor thing in these pics; I'll try to post better shots of it later this week.  You know, after I'm done taking my 39.84 hour nap, snooze:

 

Cardigan: Ann Taylor Loft Ruffle Cardigan (buy it here) (similar style here)
Corset: Nanette Lepore Ladies Night Corset (similar style here) (and here)
Pants: Banana Republic Sloan Fit Flared Pants (buy them here)
Shoes: Christian Louboutin Gres Jute (similar style here)  (and here, on sale for $35)
Belt: Banana Republic (buy it here)
Necklace: Urban Outfitters (buy it here, on sale!)
Bag: Chloe Marcie Crossbody (similar style here) (and here) (and here)

Outfit Of The Day (& Back)

What a weekend, what a weekend.  Husband and I traveled back to Sioux Falls, South Dakota (as most of you likely gathered) for a good friend's wedding, and since we chose to drive it was a pretty quick trip- we left Wednesday night, and drove back yesterday.  About 12 long hours each way in the car, which killed two entire days, but roadtrips are always a bit fun and exciting, hm?  So fun.  In fact, I learned a few things on this trip.



I learned:

1. You always think that when you hit something on the road, you know- an animal- an animal lover such as yourself will go make sure it's okay.  When it actually happens, especially on a dark and desolate highway in Wyoming with no cell phone service, YOU ARE MAD.  SO MAD YOU KIND OF WANT TO GO FIND THE DEER AND PUNCH IT IN ITS FACE. (It bounced off anyway, probably with a good butt bruise, but whatever.  It's dark, you can't see a damn thing, the only flashlight you have is your iphone, and that's that.  I'm sure Bambi was fine.  Let's just pretend Bambi was fine.) (I was PMSing and angry, OKAY?)

2. You kind of remember the humidity in Sioux Falls after living there for 21 years, but you don't really remember it until you're in it.  Hello muggy, frizzy, sweaty fun times!

3. When you're driving back home and suddenly realize that the 100 ounce soda you drank ran right through you, but you're 60 miles from any sort of rest stop except the one you JUST passed, turn around.  Because just like the Law of Gravity and the Law of Washing Your Car So It will Rain, there is a Law of You Think That Next Rest Stop Is 60 Miles And You Can Hold It until Then, but It's Really 600 Miles After You Get Rerouted On a Detour Just Outside of North Platte, And Those Fuckers In North Platte Thought It'd Be Hysterical To Reroute Everyone To Steinkjer, Norway. 

4. I also thought it'd be a little tricky to cross the Atlantic ocean in just a car, but it isn't. Thanks North Platte.  Love you.

5. Those super annoying loud people at the McDonalds you stopped at?  The one with the kid that wouldn't stop squeaking his chair for 15 minutes straight as his parents said nothing, squeaking is so hard it was making an almost inaudible pitch about 100 times louder than someone scraping their fork across their ceramic dinner plate? You're going to meet them again.  No worries.

6. You're going to meet them again in a rest area in Sterling as you can hear the Tornado sirens wail because you're caught in one insane thunderstorm that is moving 10mph.  

7. Airplanes all the way from now on, even if we're just driving 15 minutes into Denver.  Forever, and ever, and ever, amen. 


8. (ETA at 5:31pm) I just shopped my idea for a new reality TV show called "Chloe Guacamole: Deer Puncher" to TLC via a very convincing email; thought it'd fit nicely between Mall Cops: Mall of America and I Didn't Know I was Pregnant, I Just Thought That That Extreme Salty Food Bender I Went On This Past Summer At The State Fair And Rodeo Caused Me To Bloat And Gain 37 Pounds Overnight. 


I'm wringing my hands in excitement right now, will keep you posted.

So!  Super educational trip here.  Aside from all that, we did have a blast- so it's hard to feel too angsty.  Boring trips are never fun to talk about anyway, and I'll have pictures of it all later.

Now an outfit.  I love the unique print on this dress from Tela, but the surplice thing is obnoxiously  gape-y, as you can see in my last photo.  To the point of being obscene.  A few simple stitches to sew it shut fixed it (after I snapped these photos), but again UO- I'm getting kind of tired of fixing items that are expensive enough that they shouldn't need fixing.  AHEM:

Cardigan: Ann Taylor Loft (buy it here + 20% off with code "LDMAUG2010A") (similar style sans ruffles here)

Dress: Tela Silky Zip Surplice Dress (buy it here + 10% off with code "CLASSACT")

Belt: Forever 21 (similar style here) (and here + 10% off with code "CLASSACT")

Shoes: ALDO Goodsite Sandals (buy them here, on sale) (similar style here)

Purse: Botkier Cleo Satchel (similar style here) (and here)